To start this blog off with a bang, I feel the need to explain me. Me in so many words as not to disclose who I truly am but in more words as to have you feel sympathy and attatchment to my story. If that even made any sense.
the basics: I am 23 years old. grew up in a LARGE family (6 girls and one boy, second in comand of the siblings) My parents were never divorced (although I sometimes fantisized of this :) )and handle all seven kids with great stride. Not saying that there werent stresses and that none of us are inevitably screwed up, but we are all alive. Thats what matters right?
I moved away from home at 18 to run away with the man I now call my husband. Little did I know I would be forever indebted to him by allowing him to steal every ounce of my heart. Also, little did I know, the wonderful baggage that would come along with this amazing man. That being two amazing step children that I would have to learn to love as my own, and another two-year old little boy that God put into one womans life a few months after my first daughter was born (long story) by what seemed to be a mistake. But we all know he has a plan. To top it all off, never did I realize how hard it would be to share the man I love with not just an ex wife, but an ex one night stand that never got closure from the father of her child. Yes, TWO woman to share with, FIVE kids to give love to. How can it be done. We're currently trying to juggle this along with the many heartaches and challenges of marriage.
I was impregnated with my first amazing daughter at the age of 19 and gave birth to her at 20. I then moved back in with parents and mingled the single mom life for nearly a year, when God finally went "bonk" on my dear husbands head and he asked for my hand in marriage.
I then moved to utah only to endure more struggles as a young mom and newly married without any sense of God leading my life. two years and thousands of tears, giggles, and days later, we are hitting our final test in marriage. Now rooted in New Mexico (but my presently in utah and my hubby in New Mexico) I now have God at the center of my life. although it did take the doom of divorce, and a deep depression to finally fully commit to Him, I feel I may have my life heading down the right path for the first time.
I am currently pregnant with my second child, my husbands fifth, a beautiful little girl, who has taken the brunt of all the stresses and pains. I hurt her, worse than a mom could, by not fully focusing on her during these scary times. Which I will fill everyone in on in the next blog...
until then. chew on this.
No comments:
Post a Comment